I got a text today from Jimbo; this is how the text conversation went:
JB- Male singer who sang “oh my gosh”????
Gumbo- Dunno, never even heard of it
JB- Album was called confessions??
Gumbo- Are you texting the right guy???What you the fuck you on about???? Mong x
JB- Yes, need the answer!!
I couldn’t be bothered at this point, it all sounded too hip for me and I am not into music or recent music enough to know what the hell he was on about; Frankly I thought he had the wrong bloke!
He then rang........
It has since become apparent that I should have said the answer ‘Usher’ (he is a singer and dancer).
Jim will then have said
"yes please, next year October the 1st".
I ruined his joke and I felt bad; mind you I blame him for asking me such awkward questions. I am 34 but my brain and tastes are 54.
Sorry James but thanks, it will be an honour to fill the shoes of a guy who clearly wasn’t good enough to be best man but good enough to be given the mundane jobs of a wedding!
I’ll get him back though, I am going to take the whole family, by then it will total five; that’s a cool £200......Nice
Wednesday, 3 November 2010
Piper
I have never been one to be star struck or even bothered by the world of celebrities.
To put it bluntly, they annoy the crap out of me; very few seem to handle it with class and dignity, many are an embarrassment and really are pointless wastes of space.
This is where Piper comes in, Billy Piper.
Piper, covers her face as she comes through the door and then pretends to look at items that Starbucks sells.
Who looks at that stuff?!
She clearly only does this to keep a 'low profile' and not let anybody see her face, hence no-one will no who she is.
Are people really that bothered? It has got to the point where I just want to go up to her and tell her no one is bothered my dear.
She comes in quite alot and I have never seen anybody badger her for an autograph so i am sure she can relax by now.
She also needs a wash.
To put it bluntly, they annoy the crap out of me; very few seem to handle it with class and dignity, many are an embarrassment and really are pointless wastes of space.
This is where Piper comes in, Billy Piper.
Piper, covers her face as she comes through the door and then pretends to look at items that Starbucks sells.
Who looks at that stuff?!
She clearly only does this to keep a 'low profile' and not let anybody see her face, hence no-one will no who she is.
Are people really that bothered? It has got to the point where I just want to go up to her and tell her no one is bothered my dear.
She comes in quite alot and I have never seen anybody badger her for an autograph so i am sure she can relax by now.
She also needs a wash.
Good ol' fashion bullying
I joined this job more or less completely out of the blue; I had absolutely no intention of being a Firefighter. I am sure that when I was young, like all kids, I wanted to be one but as a young adult my ambition to be one was pretty much not there and I was happy to completely waste my early adult life by undertaking jobs with no ambition and future!
It all just fell on my lap really, it is incredibly hard to get in to the job and I got in. I was proud of myself and have been for the 11 years since and take immense pleasure in the fact that I am a good Firefighter with plenty of experience and knowledge.
I have built up this experience and knowledge by constantly learning and improving my skills within the job. Like everybody in every job, boredom and being stale can sometimes creep in, this very rarely happens when you are a Firefighter. You are constantly aware that in the next few minutes you can be putting your life at risk to save others.
It isn’t a statement to take lightly either, we have very good safeguards in place to protect us, but ultimately, we will risk our lives at no second thought for our own. That’s how it works as a Firefighter. That’s why I joined this service and we should never forget that.
Unfortunately, since the first day I walked into my first fire station-Kingston, we have had the threat of job insecurity hanging over our heads, rumours of shift changes have been hanging around longer than the five years quoted for negotiations. It isn’t a nice feeling either, knowing the reasons behind the changes when no public seem to know, is a really stressful time. We cannot be heard behind all the spin and lies.
Let me put it in how it will be.
I promise you this; in a couple of years time there is a realistic threat of you not having a fire engine at your property within the crucial time needed to rescue persons or save your property. This is fact.
We as a service have targets to meet; many of these are pointless targets. The ones that matter to us are targets like attendance times. I.e. how long it takes to get to your property if you have a fire
Currently across London, no matter where you live, we aim to be there within 3-4 min’s. This is good going, and we as a brigade and union of firefighters like to deliver that target because it is a target that matters.
It is a cliché to say that every second counts but it really does. For years, quieter stations have been under threat of closure, unofficially of course. If the brigade gets their way, they will close these stations at night and redeploy firefighters elsewhere. You as the general public who pay for these services will have to wait crucial extra minutes for a fire appliance to arrive, costly really when you measure this dispute in lives lost or money saved.
If you are not bothered by this at this point then fine but imagine it is you? Imagine your house? Your family? Devastation doesn’t discriminate.
As a human being, let alone a Firefighter I find this all abhorrent. If cuts are proved to be needed, then we know where they can be made and that is why we tend to be the best people to consult.
Our employers, the London Fire Brigade (LFEPA) are not being very honest with the people of London for who they ultimately serve, they have been an embarrassment and I am now ashamed that they are my employers, I and nearly 6000 others.
I will explain why.
We have been negotiating shift changes, they haven’t really negotiated; they have only offered us one shift to do in 5 years. 12 hr shifts. That isn’t negotiation.
I’m sure many people cannot see the problem, in black and white; neither can I.
However, we currently complete a 48 rolling shift of 2 days of 9 hours and 2 nights of 15 hrs, to have 12 hours would mean the equalise our shifts as the same hours no matter what day or night we do. This is the clever part for the brigade, they can now put us on 4 day shifts to complete our hours very easily. Meaning that we can effectively do fewer night shifts, which means they can close fire stations at night. Easy huh?!
On the current system if we did four 9 hr day shifts we are 12 hrs short of what we do now.
12 hrs per shift looks harmless enough until you, like us; know the reasons behind this.
There is also a document that was leaked last year that we have all seen, that shows LFEPA’s plans to close stations.
When confronted by the union over this, LFEPA did not deny it. This document is highly sensitive and should be the main focal point of the dispute but unfortunately certain sections of the media do not want to concentrate on this and only want to rubbish the good name of thousands of firefighters by publishing slurs and pointless stories that the public already know.
The LFEPA is chaired by a politician by the name of Brian Coleman, one vile politician to say the least; there is video footage of him abusing other members of the authority on YouTube. If you see this, it sums him up. It also sums up the way that Coleman, his cronies and the London fire brigade have handled this dispute.
LFEPA have said they have been negotiating for 5 yrs and enough is now enough, in August they issued all Firefighters with a Section 188 notice. This is a section of a Trade Union and Labour Act which effectively means that they can sack me and then re-employ me on a new contract without consultation. Makes any contract pointless really then doesn’t it?! And that is exactly the reason we are striking.
We have asked them to lift it and deal with negotiations properly but Brian Coleman and our Commissioner will not.
It is them that are putting lives at risk. Not us.
You cannot negotiate your contract when they have Section 188 hanging over you, it is not fair and we are fighting this for that reason only.
Lift the notice and the strikes stop immediately.
We are not striking because of the shift change, we accept and have accepted they are going to change, but we know why they want the hours that they want and not the hours we have offered.
The brigade are hiding behind a flimsy excuse that more productivity will be produced. This doesn’t hold up either, we have hit every target for years and only two years ago the commissioner congratulated us on being the best brigade in the country for targets etc.
A very strange about turn from him to demand more isn’t it?!!
There are definitely only 24 hrs in a day.
12 hr shifts and the 11/13 hr shifts they have since offered but with many changes to our contract, are detrimental to our family lives, many Firefighters cannot afford to live in London due to the cost of living. If their shift was 12 hrs they will never see their families which are already a problem on the shifts we are on now!
The LFEPA argument for all of this is fundamentally flawed and we know why....that is why I write this piece. To let you my friends know the reasons behind such a minor shift change.
If the London fire brigade get their way then contracts will cease to mean anything.
I find it a strange world.
In the U.S.A the fire brigade is revered and held in such high regard, here amongst the government and media, we are attacked. Why?
We do not want to strike; I never thought it would come to this. I want to be out there fighting fires and at many of the other incidents we are trained to deal with.
WE DO NOT WANT TO STRIKE.
I am not asking for more money or better conditions, I am asking that they leave us alone and lift the Section 188.
IF IT ISN’T BROKE, THEN DONT FIX IT.
I am sorry to friends and family who follow my ‘sporadic’ blogging who are reading this and fed up with me going on about it, I know I try to make people smile with my blog but this is something I feel very passionate about. As you can imagine, it is my career; so I am bound to be.
I am also now a father, with another child on the way; this is more than just a job; I have to provide and safeguard my family’s future. Any changes to my contract and conditions of work should be negotiated like adults and not like bullies.
LIFT THE SECTION 188 AND THE STRIKES WILL CEASE.
I went on strike on the 1st of November; the support that we got from the general public was immense. I really mean it. It gives us a lift to know that the public are realising what this is about and not reading the trash that papers like The Sun or The Mail dish out. It is disgusting to think that our own brigade, who so readily praise us to the media for their own gain are so ready to tarnish our good name in the papers.
These papers have published names, the whereabouts of where we live, accused us of asking for ‘blood’ money to stop the strikes. This information all came from a dossier handed to the media, this dossier was apparently given with the printed words ‘unleash hell on the firefighters’!!
That is exactly what The Sun and The Mail in turn did, what a nice way to pay you back by your bosses huh?
They don’t get their own way from bullying, so they tarnish each and every one of us. They have of course denied this but information was so sensitive that it could only come from a senior officer. Nice people, I don’t think I deserve this........
Current slurs include a second job accusation......Why the venom at this? Do you think we like to do a second job to make ends meet??? What’s so wrong with it? Surely the question of whether we get paid enough to save your lives is what should be asked?
Nurses, teachers, soldiers etc... More than can be listed are doing second jobs to make ends meet whether allowed to or not. The fact is that with permission, the brigade allows this. In the story printed, this acceptance by the brigade is even printed.
Slur: we get paid a living allowance to live in London but we live in the country or suburbs...
What an absolutely pointless waste of effort this slur is. We get London weighting allowance, like everybody in London entitled to it, it is not to live in London, and it is a paltry amount paid due to the cost of living in London compared to elsewhere in the country.
THIS IS SUCH A NON STORY I WOULD HAVE SACKED THE JOURNALIST IF I WAS AN EDITOR.
One of the things that ill-informed members of the public seem to think is that the army will be stepping in.... “Our brave boys will return from Afghanistan to cover you lazy reckless firefighters!” you can get from people; it is these things I hear that infuriate me.
So very wrong, they are nothing to do with this and will continue to be held in high regard by myself and my colleagues, they do what they do, that is their contract, and this is mine. They will stay where they are fighting pointless wars and being undermined by the same pointless un-trustable politicians that are attacking us.
WE DO NOT WANT THIS STRIKE, LIFT THE SECTION 188 and continue negotiations, nobody wants to strike. You have made this situation but because of the arrogance of Coleman, who is only in this for his personal promotion in the Tory party; this situation will only get worse.
The army are not covering the strikes, you as Londoners are being covered with 1/5th of the fire engines usually required....
A private company, yes, a private company employed to cover, little experience and little skill have already been an embarrassment to our Commissioner and Coleman insists that London is safe, It is not.
How can it be right that we have to complete almost 5 months training at training school, yet they have had two weeks. It is dangerous, outright irresponsible by the Commissioner and Coleman to say that you as Londoners are safe.
LONDON IS NOT SAFE WITH ASSET CO IN CHARGE.
There are lots more to this but I believe I have covered what I need to cover for my friends and family.
If you want to know more about Coleman then punch up his name on Google, A vile man to say the least, look at his expenses at your peril, they are a compelling read.......!
YouTube him......a compelling watch.......!
You make your mind up, don’t believe the spin of the Tory papers or the general right wing papers, The Mail accuse people of sponging with no job but then vilify us for having two!!
You couldn’t make it up......
Well, they could.......
If you need any more information to support me and my friends through this then I am always ready to answer my phone to you on this ( I’m so good at returning calls as you know!)
It all just fell on my lap really, it is incredibly hard to get in to the job and I got in. I was proud of myself and have been for the 11 years since and take immense pleasure in the fact that I am a good Firefighter with plenty of experience and knowledge.
I have built up this experience and knowledge by constantly learning and improving my skills within the job. Like everybody in every job, boredom and being stale can sometimes creep in, this very rarely happens when you are a Firefighter. You are constantly aware that in the next few minutes you can be putting your life at risk to save others.
It isn’t a statement to take lightly either, we have very good safeguards in place to protect us, but ultimately, we will risk our lives at no second thought for our own. That’s how it works as a Firefighter. That’s why I joined this service and we should never forget that.
Unfortunately, since the first day I walked into my first fire station-Kingston, we have had the threat of job insecurity hanging over our heads, rumours of shift changes have been hanging around longer than the five years quoted for negotiations. It isn’t a nice feeling either, knowing the reasons behind the changes when no public seem to know, is a really stressful time. We cannot be heard behind all the spin and lies.
Let me put it in how it will be.
I promise you this; in a couple of years time there is a realistic threat of you not having a fire engine at your property within the crucial time needed to rescue persons or save your property. This is fact.
We as a service have targets to meet; many of these are pointless targets. The ones that matter to us are targets like attendance times. I.e. how long it takes to get to your property if you have a fire
Currently across London, no matter where you live, we aim to be there within 3-4 min’s. This is good going, and we as a brigade and union of firefighters like to deliver that target because it is a target that matters.
It is a cliché to say that every second counts but it really does. For years, quieter stations have been under threat of closure, unofficially of course. If the brigade gets their way, they will close these stations at night and redeploy firefighters elsewhere. You as the general public who pay for these services will have to wait crucial extra minutes for a fire appliance to arrive, costly really when you measure this dispute in lives lost or money saved.
If you are not bothered by this at this point then fine but imagine it is you? Imagine your house? Your family? Devastation doesn’t discriminate.
As a human being, let alone a Firefighter I find this all abhorrent. If cuts are proved to be needed, then we know where they can be made and that is why we tend to be the best people to consult.
Our employers, the London Fire Brigade (LFEPA) are not being very honest with the people of London for who they ultimately serve, they have been an embarrassment and I am now ashamed that they are my employers, I and nearly 6000 others.
I will explain why.
We have been negotiating shift changes, they haven’t really negotiated; they have only offered us one shift to do in 5 years. 12 hr shifts. That isn’t negotiation.
I’m sure many people cannot see the problem, in black and white; neither can I.
However, we currently complete a 48 rolling shift of 2 days of 9 hours and 2 nights of 15 hrs, to have 12 hours would mean the equalise our shifts as the same hours no matter what day or night we do. This is the clever part for the brigade, they can now put us on 4 day shifts to complete our hours very easily. Meaning that we can effectively do fewer night shifts, which means they can close fire stations at night. Easy huh?!
On the current system if we did four 9 hr day shifts we are 12 hrs short of what we do now.
12 hrs per shift looks harmless enough until you, like us; know the reasons behind this.
There is also a document that was leaked last year that we have all seen, that shows LFEPA’s plans to close stations.
When confronted by the union over this, LFEPA did not deny it. This document is highly sensitive and should be the main focal point of the dispute but unfortunately certain sections of the media do not want to concentrate on this and only want to rubbish the good name of thousands of firefighters by publishing slurs and pointless stories that the public already know.
The LFEPA is chaired by a politician by the name of Brian Coleman, one vile politician to say the least; there is video footage of him abusing other members of the authority on YouTube. If you see this, it sums him up. It also sums up the way that Coleman, his cronies and the London fire brigade have handled this dispute.
LFEPA have said they have been negotiating for 5 yrs and enough is now enough, in August they issued all Firefighters with a Section 188 notice. This is a section of a Trade Union and Labour Act which effectively means that they can sack me and then re-employ me on a new contract without consultation. Makes any contract pointless really then doesn’t it?! And that is exactly the reason we are striking.
We have asked them to lift it and deal with negotiations properly but Brian Coleman and our Commissioner will not.
It is them that are putting lives at risk. Not us.
You cannot negotiate your contract when they have Section 188 hanging over you, it is not fair and we are fighting this for that reason only.
Lift the notice and the strikes stop immediately.
We are not striking because of the shift change, we accept and have accepted they are going to change, but we know why they want the hours that they want and not the hours we have offered.
The brigade are hiding behind a flimsy excuse that more productivity will be produced. This doesn’t hold up either, we have hit every target for years and only two years ago the commissioner congratulated us on being the best brigade in the country for targets etc.
A very strange about turn from him to demand more isn’t it?!!
There are definitely only 24 hrs in a day.
12 hr shifts and the 11/13 hr shifts they have since offered but with many changes to our contract, are detrimental to our family lives, many Firefighters cannot afford to live in London due to the cost of living. If their shift was 12 hrs they will never see their families which are already a problem on the shifts we are on now!
The LFEPA argument for all of this is fundamentally flawed and we know why....that is why I write this piece. To let you my friends know the reasons behind such a minor shift change.
If the London fire brigade get their way then contracts will cease to mean anything.
I find it a strange world.
In the U.S.A the fire brigade is revered and held in such high regard, here amongst the government and media, we are attacked. Why?
We do not want to strike; I never thought it would come to this. I want to be out there fighting fires and at many of the other incidents we are trained to deal with.
WE DO NOT WANT TO STRIKE.
I am not asking for more money or better conditions, I am asking that they leave us alone and lift the Section 188.
IF IT ISN’T BROKE, THEN DONT FIX IT.
I am sorry to friends and family who follow my ‘sporadic’ blogging who are reading this and fed up with me going on about it, I know I try to make people smile with my blog but this is something I feel very passionate about. As you can imagine, it is my career; so I am bound to be.
I am also now a father, with another child on the way; this is more than just a job; I have to provide and safeguard my family’s future. Any changes to my contract and conditions of work should be negotiated like adults and not like bullies.
LIFT THE SECTION 188 AND THE STRIKES WILL CEASE.
I went on strike on the 1st of November; the support that we got from the general public was immense. I really mean it. It gives us a lift to know that the public are realising what this is about and not reading the trash that papers like The Sun or The Mail dish out. It is disgusting to think that our own brigade, who so readily praise us to the media for their own gain are so ready to tarnish our good name in the papers.
These papers have published names, the whereabouts of where we live, accused us of asking for ‘blood’ money to stop the strikes. This information all came from a dossier handed to the media, this dossier was apparently given with the printed words ‘unleash hell on the firefighters’!!
That is exactly what The Sun and The Mail in turn did, what a nice way to pay you back by your bosses huh?
They don’t get their own way from bullying, so they tarnish each and every one of us. They have of course denied this but information was so sensitive that it could only come from a senior officer. Nice people, I don’t think I deserve this........
Current slurs include a second job accusation......Why the venom at this? Do you think we like to do a second job to make ends meet??? What’s so wrong with it? Surely the question of whether we get paid enough to save your lives is what should be asked?
Nurses, teachers, soldiers etc... More than can be listed are doing second jobs to make ends meet whether allowed to or not. The fact is that with permission, the brigade allows this. In the story printed, this acceptance by the brigade is even printed.
Slur: we get paid a living allowance to live in London but we live in the country or suburbs...
What an absolutely pointless waste of effort this slur is. We get London weighting allowance, like everybody in London entitled to it, it is not to live in London, and it is a paltry amount paid due to the cost of living in London compared to elsewhere in the country.
THIS IS SUCH A NON STORY I WOULD HAVE SACKED THE JOURNALIST IF I WAS AN EDITOR.
One of the things that ill-informed members of the public seem to think is that the army will be stepping in.... “Our brave boys will return from Afghanistan to cover you lazy reckless firefighters!” you can get from people; it is these things I hear that infuriate me.
So very wrong, they are nothing to do with this and will continue to be held in high regard by myself and my colleagues, they do what they do, that is their contract, and this is mine. They will stay where they are fighting pointless wars and being undermined by the same pointless un-trustable politicians that are attacking us.
WE DO NOT WANT THIS STRIKE, LIFT THE SECTION 188 and continue negotiations, nobody wants to strike. You have made this situation but because of the arrogance of Coleman, who is only in this for his personal promotion in the Tory party; this situation will only get worse.
The army are not covering the strikes, you as Londoners are being covered with 1/5th of the fire engines usually required....
A private company, yes, a private company employed to cover, little experience and little skill have already been an embarrassment to our Commissioner and Coleman insists that London is safe, It is not.
How can it be right that we have to complete almost 5 months training at training school, yet they have had two weeks. It is dangerous, outright irresponsible by the Commissioner and Coleman to say that you as Londoners are safe.
LONDON IS NOT SAFE WITH ASSET CO IN CHARGE.
There are lots more to this but I believe I have covered what I need to cover for my friends and family.
If you want to know more about Coleman then punch up his name on Google, A vile man to say the least, look at his expenses at your peril, they are a compelling read.......!
YouTube him......a compelling watch.......!
You make your mind up, don’t believe the spin of the Tory papers or the general right wing papers, The Mail accuse people of sponging with no job but then vilify us for having two!!
You couldn’t make it up......
Well, they could.......
If you need any more information to support me and my friends through this then I am always ready to answer my phone to you on this ( I’m so good at returning calls as you know!)
Friday, 29 October 2010
A return to the good old days
I am not sure if playing a few games of poker again were the way forward.
I am not too shabby at poker I can tell ya, If I had more time, I would have never stopped playing; but family comes first now and to be honest, it has done me the world of good.
I only started playing today more due to Natasha's attention seeking 'morning sickness'!
Which, by the way; has lasted all day????!!
They, in the poker world; say there is a poker god.
I mean, if I am to be pursuaded that there is a god of any description at all; I now believe there is a good chance.
My third game today after a win and a second in a sit'n go.......
Mr poker god decides to lay out a Royal Flush. Now, it isn't my first but they usually amount to nothing but I took out three guys wuth this one!
This is not on, and I will tell you why; someone somewhere is trying to lure me back to wasting hours of my life playing cards again.
Before I go any further, I am happy with this, but Natasha wouldn't be.......
Come on, a win, a second, then a Royal flush to take down the third????
Already this evening I have been dreaming of Live tournaments like back in the days of travelling to Edinburgh or the Midlands to compete....
I have to get this out of my mind.....
HELPPPPPPP
I am not too shabby at poker I can tell ya, If I had more time, I would have never stopped playing; but family comes first now and to be honest, it has done me the world of good.
I only started playing today more due to Natasha's attention seeking 'morning sickness'!
Which, by the way; has lasted all day????!!
They, in the poker world; say there is a poker god.
I mean, if I am to be pursuaded that there is a god of any description at all; I now believe there is a good chance.
My third game today after a win and a second in a sit'n go.......
Mr poker god decides to lay out a Royal Flush. Now, it isn't my first but they usually amount to nothing but I took out three guys wuth this one!
This is not on, and I will tell you why; someone somewhere is trying to lure me back to wasting hours of my life playing cards again.
Before I go any further, I am happy with this, but Natasha wouldn't be.......
Come on, a win, a second, then a Royal flush to take down the third????
Already this evening I have been dreaming of Live tournaments like back in the days of travelling to Edinburgh or the Midlands to compete....
I have to get this out of my mind.....
HELPPPPPPP
A new Dawn/beginning/same old bollox
I had so much enjoyment writing about the last pregnancy, that I feel it would be wrong if I didn’t get my arse back to this blogging stuff; At least while she is pregnant with Keeble number two.
It is hard getting back into this but I had enough emails and nudges by others to convince me that more blogging would be well received.
To be honest, I still read back to all my other posts and it is good to have a record of what is going on...
I would only lose an actual diary anyway!
I suppose an update on the first Keeble would be a good idea before I start ranting about the effects of the second pregnancy on our family!
Well, Isabella Blue Keeble is now 15 months and pretty. That’s about it for me on that one.....Just kidding; she is an amazing bundle of skin and blonde hair and makes me laugh a lot more than cry.
This is a good thing.
What is also a good thing is that she has only kept us up in the middle of the night 5 times since she was born.
I can hark back to the days when peoples only advice seemed to be
“well, say goodbye to sleep-filled nights”, well? So far so good for the Lew Lew!!!
Isabella has a character; she has her own little ways already even though she sometimes develops what I could only call ‘small girl syndrome’...
She clearly thinks she is older already, she demands by screaming Mum or Dad quite loudly and has a penchant for climbing things, namely onto window sills and tables. Mind you, as I write this I have just witnessed her fall off said table, onto bench, then onto floor; which would be quite funny if she wasn’t screaming her head off....oops.
So....... I’ll be back on more often again.
This time I mean it!
It is hard getting back into this but I had enough emails and nudges by others to convince me that more blogging would be well received.
To be honest, I still read back to all my other posts and it is good to have a record of what is going on...
I would only lose an actual diary anyway!
I suppose an update on the first Keeble would be a good idea before I start ranting about the effects of the second pregnancy on our family!
Well, Isabella Blue Keeble is now 15 months and pretty. That’s about it for me on that one.....Just kidding; she is an amazing bundle of skin and blonde hair and makes me laugh a lot more than cry.
This is a good thing.
What is also a good thing is that she has only kept us up in the middle of the night 5 times since she was born.
I can hark back to the days when peoples only advice seemed to be
“well, say goodbye to sleep-filled nights”, well? So far so good for the Lew Lew!!!
Isabella has a character; she has her own little ways already even though she sometimes develops what I could only call ‘small girl syndrome’...
She clearly thinks she is older already, she demands by screaming Mum or Dad quite loudly and has a penchant for climbing things, namely onto window sills and tables. Mind you, as I write this I have just witnessed her fall off said table, onto bench, then onto floor; which would be quite funny if she wasn’t screaming her head off....oops.
So....... I’ll be back on more often again.
This time I mean it!
Saturday, 7 August 2010
The blue line
'The cycle super highway'.....
If you hadn't have already seen the eyesore that is the 'cycle super highway', then you would be forgiven for thinking that it it some kind of elevated track from A to B that you merely place your wheels on and it transports you to 'B' from 'A' at breakneck speeds.
Well, that is the vision that I had anyway!
Let me disappoint you somewhat, the cycle highway is on ground level; along the same roads we have always had. In fact, it is in many places, the same cycle lane we always had. But now with an exciting difference........drumroll please.....
The exciting difference is, it is now blue in colour. Yes thats right, blue in colour. Unfortunately this amazing difference is lost on the colour blind cyclist, or the blind cyclist for that matter but I am sure their clever dogs can tell them what they are missing out on.
The said cycle highway is just basically a blue cycle lane all the way from Merton to the city, what a complete waste of time. It looks like cars and motorbikes can still use the same section anyway so all it really does is highlight when they get knocked off next.
So here I am slagging off the 'cycle super highway' and yet I have used it, I used it a few days ago, it wasn't any quicker of course but there was one fantastic outcome. I saw cyclists actually being pulled over and fined for going through red lights.
So after all that, the new Barclays blue cycle highway is such a bad thing after all.
If you hadn't have already seen the eyesore that is the 'cycle super highway', then you would be forgiven for thinking that it it some kind of elevated track from A to B that you merely place your wheels on and it transports you to 'B' from 'A' at breakneck speeds.
Well, that is the vision that I had anyway!
Let me disappoint you somewhat, the cycle highway is on ground level; along the same roads we have always had. In fact, it is in many places, the same cycle lane we always had. But now with an exciting difference........drumroll please.....
The exciting difference is, it is now blue in colour. Yes thats right, blue in colour. Unfortunately this amazing difference is lost on the colour blind cyclist, or the blind cyclist for that matter but I am sure their clever dogs can tell them what they are missing out on.
The said cycle highway is just basically a blue cycle lane all the way from Merton to the city, what a complete waste of time. It looks like cars and motorbikes can still use the same section anyway so all it really does is highlight when they get knocked off next.
So here I am slagging off the 'cycle super highway' and yet I have used it, I used it a few days ago, it wasn't any quicker of course but there was one fantastic outcome. I saw cyclists actually being pulled over and fined for going through red lights.
So after all that, the new Barclays blue cycle highway is such a bad thing after all.
Thursday, 5 August 2010
On ya Bike!!
As I have said before and for those who know me, I work alot. I work a hell of alot; it is hard to believe sometimes that I fit in the work and leisure at all.
Two jobs, Family, leisure, studying the knowledge.
I basically do not have time to fill this blog for myself and that puts pressure on me because I feel like I could write this stuff for a long time. If I had the time of course! I said ‘time’ there three times....That isn’t very good English but I am tired (from all the things i try to do)
I have been meaning to write about something for a while, a truly cringe worthy, shameful moment that I have to hang my head for and will hang my head for, for many a year to come.
Before I put it on here for all to see, thus stamping my title of doofus of the year, let me get a couple of things straight.
A- I absolutely have no problem with taking a joke or being the butt of a joke.
B- I hate and despise being embarrassed and ashamed.
Ok, now, with statement A, for those that may have ever noticed, I am the butt of endless jokes regarding my eyes (eye)...... I do give it out so I have to take it.
With statement B.... unfortunately one of my personality traits, which i am not particularly keen on, is that I cannot handle stupidity.
I do not consider myself above anybody but I do consider myself far from stupid and clever enough to deal with most occurrences and situations that this big bad world chucks at me. I find it hard to keep my mouth shut when I witness stupidity; I have to bite my lip. If truth be told, and the truth has to be told on my own blog, It is my biggest annoyance with human kind.
Most of them are completely thick.
So.....
A few weeks ago I popped out after a particularly arduous week of two jobs, family, and Knowledge study (ZZZzzzzz)
I only popped out to the wine bar/pub for a beer with my good friends from my second job, they are good pals of mine and I was only going to consume the one as I was on my scooter. I arrived at the bar early evening and parked up right outside the bar so I could keep a close watch on the bike just in case any ‘youths of today’ or ’chavs’ as they are known, decided to have a nice Friday joyride at my expense.
It was a great hour or so, time to relax, have a laugh, basically; a release from the stress. I had one and a half pints of the usual medium strength rubbish and felt it was time to go home to my family. I said my goodbyes and made my way out of a now very full public house, both inside and outside, what with the nice weather and all the smokers.
For some strange reason, and not the first time I found myself very nervous about getting on my bike in front of all these people and riding away. Why? I haven’t a clue why? But I was and now I felt pressure that was of all my own making. I mean blimey, I only have to get on my bike and ride away; I do it every day on my own. I felt they were all looking at me, what else did they have to look at? I suddenly had made a small everyday occurrence into a massive ‘open mic’ conundrum. Why? Oh why? Did I park the bike right outside, I never checked up on it once anyway.
Get on the bike and ride away.
Don’t stare at anybody.
Don’t wobble or make a sound with the bike.
Just drive away inconspicuously as you would normally.
All I kept saying to myself outside were the above things, over and over and over.
I put my helmet on, key in, ignition and on I got.
So far so good for Lewis and the ‘big event’ of driving away from a busy bar.
I pulled away and for a split second, a minute moment, I had done it, driven away from the bar and released the weird nerves except at that point, the bike just went away from under me, I only just caught it, phew, i had stayed on my feet. But why?...for that moment, that second, I didnt have clue, turned around to look at the people.
They were staring, some sniggering, but pretty much all looking at me. Then it hit me, I had tried to drive away with the wire lock on the backwheel.
It had caused me to come to a complete stop, the back wheel wouldnt even go round so I could wheel it to the side.
I cannot begin to tell you the embarrassement I felt at that given time. I even play acted, good heavens, I play acted and pretended I didnt know what was wrong. I hadnt a chance in hell of getting away with everybody believing that the bike had messed up. I hadnt the hope in hell of the drinkers feeling pity for the poor old scooter boy who's scooter had made him nearly come a cropper. No way.
I just couldnt get the bike to the side so I could then be forgotten. Oh no....I looked around and I now had cars queuing to get passed me. I just wanted to die right there and then, the shame, the stupidity.
Luckily or unluckily you may think, two of the, lets say; more drunk smokers decided that I needed help and pulled the bike to the side. They kept asking me what is wrong with the bike, I just couldnt face it but i had to tell them, I didnt want to lose face but i had to tell them that el-donkus Lewis had tried to drive away with the lock on. I couldnt tell them the reason that i drove away with the lock on was because I was a 34 year old man who got nervous for no reason about driving away......
So, I done something i am not proud of; I acted as if I was stupid and pretend that it wasnt the first time I had done it! If you could have handed me a shovel I would had dug through the tarmac and created a big hole for myself.
What really did not help the matter was that the wire of the lock was now firmly wrapped around the back wheel about eight or nine times and me and drunk and drunker were having trouble.
I daren't look around me in case I saw people pointing and laughing at me.
Oh the shame
Five minutes it took and all three were covered in grease, not that they cared, one even rubbed it in by wondering why I put a lock on such a 'shit' bike as he so kindly put it. I wasnt in the mood to argue or stand up for my precious bike.
I eventually rode away and havent been back since, I certainly wont on my bike again thats for sure.
Two jobs, Family, leisure, studying the knowledge.
I basically do not have time to fill this blog for myself and that puts pressure on me because I feel like I could write this stuff for a long time. If I had the time of course! I said ‘time’ there three times....That isn’t very good English but I am tired (from all the things i try to do)
I have been meaning to write about something for a while, a truly cringe worthy, shameful moment that I have to hang my head for and will hang my head for, for many a year to come.
Before I put it on here for all to see, thus stamping my title of doofus of the year, let me get a couple of things straight.
A- I absolutely have no problem with taking a joke or being the butt of a joke.
B- I hate and despise being embarrassed and ashamed.
Ok, now, with statement A, for those that may have ever noticed, I am the butt of endless jokes regarding my eyes (eye)...... I do give it out so I have to take it.
With statement B.... unfortunately one of my personality traits, which i am not particularly keen on, is that I cannot handle stupidity.
I do not consider myself above anybody but I do consider myself far from stupid and clever enough to deal with most occurrences and situations that this big bad world chucks at me. I find it hard to keep my mouth shut when I witness stupidity; I have to bite my lip. If truth be told, and the truth has to be told on my own blog, It is my biggest annoyance with human kind.
Most of them are completely thick.
So.....
A few weeks ago I popped out after a particularly arduous week of two jobs, family, and Knowledge study (ZZZzzzzz)
I only popped out to the wine bar/pub for a beer with my good friends from my second job, they are good pals of mine and I was only going to consume the one as I was on my scooter. I arrived at the bar early evening and parked up right outside the bar so I could keep a close watch on the bike just in case any ‘youths of today’ or ’chavs’ as they are known, decided to have a nice Friday joyride at my expense.
It was a great hour or so, time to relax, have a laugh, basically; a release from the stress. I had one and a half pints of the usual medium strength rubbish and felt it was time to go home to my family. I said my goodbyes and made my way out of a now very full public house, both inside and outside, what with the nice weather and all the smokers.
For some strange reason, and not the first time I found myself very nervous about getting on my bike in front of all these people and riding away. Why? I haven’t a clue why? But I was and now I felt pressure that was of all my own making. I mean blimey, I only have to get on my bike and ride away; I do it every day on my own. I felt they were all looking at me, what else did they have to look at? I suddenly had made a small everyday occurrence into a massive ‘open mic’ conundrum. Why? Oh why? Did I park the bike right outside, I never checked up on it once anyway.
Get on the bike and ride away.
Don’t stare at anybody.
Don’t wobble or make a sound with the bike.
Just drive away inconspicuously as you would normally.
All I kept saying to myself outside were the above things, over and over and over.
I put my helmet on, key in, ignition and on I got.
So far so good for Lewis and the ‘big event’ of driving away from a busy bar.
I pulled away and for a split second, a minute moment, I had done it, driven away from the bar and released the weird nerves except at that point, the bike just went away from under me, I only just caught it, phew, i had stayed on my feet. But why?...for that moment, that second, I didnt have clue, turned around to look at the people.
They were staring, some sniggering, but pretty much all looking at me. Then it hit me, I had tried to drive away with the wire lock on the backwheel.
It had caused me to come to a complete stop, the back wheel wouldnt even go round so I could wheel it to the side.
I cannot begin to tell you the embarrassement I felt at that given time. I even play acted, good heavens, I play acted and pretended I didnt know what was wrong. I hadnt a chance in hell of getting away with everybody believing that the bike had messed up. I hadnt the hope in hell of the drinkers feeling pity for the poor old scooter boy who's scooter had made him nearly come a cropper. No way.
I just couldnt get the bike to the side so I could then be forgotten. Oh no....I looked around and I now had cars queuing to get passed me. I just wanted to die right there and then, the shame, the stupidity.
Luckily or unluckily you may think, two of the, lets say; more drunk smokers decided that I needed help and pulled the bike to the side. They kept asking me what is wrong with the bike, I just couldnt face it but i had to tell them, I didnt want to lose face but i had to tell them that el-donkus Lewis had tried to drive away with the lock on. I couldnt tell them the reason that i drove away with the lock on was because I was a 34 year old man who got nervous for no reason about driving away......
So, I done something i am not proud of; I acted as if I was stupid and pretend that it wasnt the first time I had done it! If you could have handed me a shovel I would had dug through the tarmac and created a big hole for myself.
What really did not help the matter was that the wire of the lock was now firmly wrapped around the back wheel about eight or nine times and me and drunk and drunker were having trouble.
I daren't look around me in case I saw people pointing and laughing at me.
Oh the shame
Five minutes it took and all three were covered in grease, not that they cared, one even rubbed it in by wondering why I put a lock on such a 'shit' bike as he so kindly put it. I wasnt in the mood to argue or stand up for my precious bike.
I eventually rode away and havent been back since, I certainly wont on my bike again thats for sure.
Sunday, 28 March 2010
Sicknote
Not been on here for a while because I have inadvertantly become a sickly child.
I was warned about the fact I will become succeptible to mor illnesses, bugs and virus's but this is ridiculous.
I have never been as ill for as long. I have a good week and then a bad week where I am just not fuctioning at all. It has been getting me down but I am trying to stay positive.
Just need a little immune system boost, not too sure what the heck that could be. I could just take more vitamins but it makes my pee illuminous yellow!
I was warned about the fact I will become succeptible to mor illnesses, bugs and virus's but this is ridiculous.
I have never been as ill for as long. I have a good week and then a bad week where I am just not fuctioning at all. It has been getting me down but I am trying to stay positive.
Just need a little immune system boost, not too sure what the heck that could be. I could just take more vitamins but it makes my pee illuminous yellow!
Sunday, 28 February 2010
Dopey Ryan
He is a driver, an MD, Motor Driver, thats is his skill, that is the skill that the fire brigade give you when you past the LGV test and the blue light training, that is what is classed as a 'skill'.
I am trying to fathom how he got the MD qualification, I have asked him outright, he just shrugs his shoulders and says something that will probably make me laugh.
This is Ryan.
He has just run over my fire gear with the Turntable ladder. He has broke my lamp (torch) and he has busted my radio.
Only Ryan could do this.....He is THE dopiest (if that be a word) on the watch.
I am trying to fathom how he got the MD qualification, I have asked him outright, he just shrugs his shoulders and says something that will probably make me laugh.
This is Ryan.
He has just run over my fire gear with the Turntable ladder. He has broke my lamp (torch) and he has busted my radio.
Only Ryan could do this.....He is THE dopiest (if that be a word) on the watch.
Friday, 26 February 2010
Better Latte than never......
I finally did it.
I finally built up the courage for a spot of sophistication.
Yes, thats right, I finally had a whole cup of coffee to myself!!
It is a life defining breakthrough.
A Starbucks Medium (grande!) Latte was my choice and I would be lying if I said it went down ok. It was pretty horrid and I am sure it was making my cheek twitch as I was trying to swallow every mouthful. It wasn't that i wanted to throw up, it just wasn't nice. I am also told that a Latte is quite an easy on the tastebuds coffee to drink. Ugh.
Danny was trying to tell me something and we were deep in conversation, I am positive he must have noticed my newly discovered twitch!
Oh well, lets hope the tastebuds change in the next few years as I am fed up of just having Tea. So much variety that i can't have...........
I finally built up the courage for a spot of sophistication.
Yes, thats right, I finally had a whole cup of coffee to myself!!
It is a life defining breakthrough.
A Starbucks Medium (grande!) Latte was my choice and I would be lying if I said it went down ok. It was pretty horrid and I am sure it was making my cheek twitch as I was trying to swallow every mouthful. It wasn't that i wanted to throw up, it just wasn't nice. I am also told that a Latte is quite an easy on the tastebuds coffee to drink. Ugh.
Danny was trying to tell me something and we were deep in conversation, I am positive he must have noticed my newly discovered twitch!
Oh well, lets hope the tastebuds change in the next few years as I am fed up of just having Tea. So much variety that i can't have...........
Monday, 22 February 2010
Tears for Lew Lew
Isabella gave me a real moment last week Saturday, of course every moment is ‘a moment‘ but I had been looking after her for a few hours in the morning whilst Natasha and my sister treated Darcie to James and the giant peach at Wimbledon kids theatre.
A bit of quality time with the bubba was just perfect. She was her usual relaxed and happy self so I didn’t have trouble, I never have trouble really…..well, err…. except I still cannot dress her without turning her upside down and inside out!
Anyway, we had fun watching baby TV and playing, Natasha came back and I was then released from bubba duties and went to leave for football.
I gave her a kiss……still smiling
I gave her a wave…….still smiling
I closed the door……..tears…tears and tears.
I would be lying if I said her tears didn’t make me feel really happy inside!
I came back in to cherish the moment of my child crying her eyes out and she stopped.
I was so made up about it and being the nasty git I can be, I tried to make her cry again so I could feel even better, alas, the second time around after the kiss, the wave and the door; there were no such tears and that moment is now locked up in this blog.
I tried hard to get her to miss me since but as far, no upset child.
A bit of quality time with the bubba was just perfect. She was her usual relaxed and happy self so I didn’t have trouble, I never have trouble really…..well, err…. except I still cannot dress her without turning her upside down and inside out!
Anyway, we had fun watching baby TV and playing, Natasha came back and I was then released from bubba duties and went to leave for football.
I gave her a kiss……still smiling
I gave her a wave…….still smiling
I closed the door……..tears…tears and tears.
I would be lying if I said her tears didn’t make me feel really happy inside!
I came back in to cherish the moment of my child crying her eyes out and she stopped.
I was so made up about it and being the nasty git I can be, I tried to make her cry again so I could feel even better, alas, the second time around after the kiss, the wave and the door; there were no such tears and that moment is now locked up in this blog.
I tried hard to get her to miss me since but as far, no upset child.
Monday, 8 February 2010
A Short Blog
I think my favourite present from Christmas time has ended up being the jar of cola cubes!!!
I get a little excited when I am out of the house knowing that I will have a couple when I get back........
It is a little sad I know but then I am not big on presents because I never know what I want until the day after and wished i had asked for it.
I get a little excited when I am out of the house knowing that I will have a couple when I get back........
It is a little sad I know but then I am not big on presents because I never know what I want until the day after and wished i had asked for it.
Friday, 5 February 2010
Alert
****** ALERT ******
Today I noticed that my hair is receding rapidly and I may only have a few months of trendy haircuts left in me.
It is a bad day when you notice stuff like that. I only went to the toilet and I am now that little bit more down than I needed to be.
Damn you bursting bladder.
I have said countless times before that I am not bothered if my hair went away for good.
I have now changed my stance on this and I am particularly upset.
****** END OF ALERT ******
Today I noticed that my hair is receding rapidly and I may only have a few months of trendy haircuts left in me.
It is a bad day when you notice stuff like that. I only went to the toilet and I am now that little bit more down than I needed to be.
Damn you bursting bladder.
I have said countless times before that I am not bothered if my hair went away for good.
I have now changed my stance on this and I am particularly upset.
****** END OF ALERT ******
Thursday, 4 February 2010
For Gods Sake
Please read this and read it with no prejudices, no biases, and no prior knowledge.
I want you to imagine you have grown up the same way, the same upbringing.
BUT
Please take away any religion you have ever encountered, any values or morals you may have developed from scripture or readings/teachings of religious background.
Think for a bit and you will come up with the same world, the same people all around you, obviously there are no churches or mosques or faith centres! Perhaps we can fill those spaces with grass and playgrounds for kids?
I try to write a blog for a few different reasons but I wouldn’t want to bore anybody or myself for that matter and make it serious. I try to be funny and let my mind go mad, however, I was given bad news today when an old school friend died after a very short illness. With this very much in mind, I just want to share a few things and want people to just try to be impartial.
To me, religion of any sort is too much to take, so much time devoted to a belief, faith or cause for which there is no evidence. Obviously, religion takes up an amazing stance in all our lives but we don’t HAVE to follow it, we don’t have to do anything.
I am not religious in any way, yet I have lived a good honest life, using my own personal morals that I like to be treated the way I treat others, I didn’t need to read a book or scripture to be like this either. I learnt it from my parents, not in fear of sin.
For a start, I am not sure whose god is the real god anyway!
I’ve had a glance at a few bits and pieces of the bible, it is amazing which bits
people take and ignore or deny.
Yet there are millions upon millions that use this drivel and other drivel as a basis for their beliefs.
There is one life, the one you are in. You are reading this now and you are alive, you are so very lucky, we are all so very lucky to be here, we are an amazing animal. We think, act on, develop skills and create responsibly again and again and again.
This is the only chance, even if you have to feel there is more once we go, live this life like it is your only one.
Please.
We have an amazing gift and no more so than when I look at Isabella and think what an amazing life she has ahead of her, if she gets to meet half as many nice and different types of people as I have then she is going to have a cracker.
I know this sounds all rather deep but death is a subject that regularly brings me to tears. I am very lucky to not have had anybody in my immediate family to go but I have had one particularly amazing guy leave this life in a tragic way and today I learn of Shawn’s death just hurts my heart. I haven’t seen Shawn for a long time but he smiled and smiling is what I remember of him and always will. I will not see him again in an afterlife, I will just remember him for smiling and his warm personality
I cannot hold on to the fact I will see him again because I won’t. This is hard but a strong reality, it serves to remind me that I have to enjoy everything I can and I want others to do the same.
Death is a reality that is hard to bear, as intelligent animals we have developed emotions and feelings and I feel that makes it such a harsh reality, that we live, grow old, love and lose. It is a sick feeling I feel when I imagine what it will be like to lose people very close to me. I can’t imagine the feeling others I know have felt when they have lost people.
I am upset now just writing this down, all due to death, I get emotional when anybody dies, whether I know them or not. Somebody has lost someone and that is awful in itself. I hope that Shawn’s family hold his smile forever like I will and all my school friends. I wasn’t close to him, I just knew him well enough to be totally devastated at the news.
I hope that whoever takes time to read this takes something from these thoughts, to be honest, you are lucky because I could write a whole testament of this crap!
Sorry again!
Keep smiling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I want you to imagine you have grown up the same way, the same upbringing.
BUT
Please take away any religion you have ever encountered, any values or morals you may have developed from scripture or readings/teachings of religious background.
Think for a bit and you will come up with the same world, the same people all around you, obviously there are no churches or mosques or faith centres! Perhaps we can fill those spaces with grass and playgrounds for kids?
I try to write a blog for a few different reasons but I wouldn’t want to bore anybody or myself for that matter and make it serious. I try to be funny and let my mind go mad, however, I was given bad news today when an old school friend died after a very short illness. With this very much in mind, I just want to share a few things and want people to just try to be impartial.
To me, religion of any sort is too much to take, so much time devoted to a belief, faith or cause for which there is no evidence. Obviously, religion takes up an amazing stance in all our lives but we don’t HAVE to follow it, we don’t have to do anything.
I am not religious in any way, yet I have lived a good honest life, using my own personal morals that I like to be treated the way I treat others, I didn’t need to read a book or scripture to be like this either. I learnt it from my parents, not in fear of sin.
For a start, I am not sure whose god is the real god anyway!
I’ve had a glance at a few bits and pieces of the bible, it is amazing which bits
people take and ignore or deny.
Yet there are millions upon millions that use this drivel and other drivel as a basis for their beliefs.
There is one life, the one you are in. You are reading this now and you are alive, you are so very lucky, we are all so very lucky to be here, we are an amazing animal. We think, act on, develop skills and create responsibly again and again and again.
This is the only chance, even if you have to feel there is more once we go, live this life like it is your only one.
Please.
We have an amazing gift and no more so than when I look at Isabella and think what an amazing life she has ahead of her, if she gets to meet half as many nice and different types of people as I have then she is going to have a cracker.
I know this sounds all rather deep but death is a subject that regularly brings me to tears. I am very lucky to not have had anybody in my immediate family to go but I have had one particularly amazing guy leave this life in a tragic way and today I learn of Shawn’s death just hurts my heart. I haven’t seen Shawn for a long time but he smiled and smiling is what I remember of him and always will. I will not see him again in an afterlife, I will just remember him for smiling and his warm personality
I cannot hold on to the fact I will see him again because I won’t. This is hard but a strong reality, it serves to remind me that I have to enjoy everything I can and I want others to do the same.
Death is a reality that is hard to bear, as intelligent animals we have developed emotions and feelings and I feel that makes it such a harsh reality, that we live, grow old, love and lose. It is a sick feeling I feel when I imagine what it will be like to lose people very close to me. I can’t imagine the feeling others I know have felt when they have lost people.
I am upset now just writing this down, all due to death, I get emotional when anybody dies, whether I know them or not. Somebody has lost someone and that is awful in itself. I hope that Shawn’s family hold his smile forever like I will and all my school friends. I wasn’t close to him, I just knew him well enough to be totally devastated at the news.
I hope that whoever takes time to read this takes something from these thoughts, to be honest, you are lucky because I could write a whole testament of this crap!
Sorry again!
Keep smiling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, 29 January 2010
Lazy Days........
So, I am engaged, it hasn’t sunk in but I am very excited about it. I am not too sure I could do anymore than I have to show how much I want to be involved in the planning of this wedding, I am looking forward to browsing the venues and menus and all that goes with such an event.
My only stipulation at the moment is that I want to just enjoy all this relaxing time I seem to have at the moment, I have nothing to plan for right now, no birthdays, no engagements, no running about for others, I just have my family, my two jobs and my studying. It is still all my time but I am not getting bunged up and run down at the moment. It is a great feeling, one that I don’t come across to often and I am really enjoying it. I just seem to be planning my days better.
So, like I said to Natasha, that is my only stipulation, let’s just take it easy for a few months, planning Christmas with the Keebles took it out of us. As does arranging simple get-togethers, so for the next few months there is just nothing going to be planned.
Natasha plainly didn’t listen to my stipulation because she is so excited and has already brought ‘The Bride’ magazine, which comes with approximately 30 odd supplements and supplements of supplements.
I feel my excitement waning............I wonder if they do a groom to be? ......or shall I just buy a copy of Nuts magazine............
My only stipulation at the moment is that I want to just enjoy all this relaxing time I seem to have at the moment, I have nothing to plan for right now, no birthdays, no engagements, no running about for others, I just have my family, my two jobs and my studying. It is still all my time but I am not getting bunged up and run down at the moment. It is a great feeling, one that I don’t come across to often and I am really enjoying it. I just seem to be planning my days better.
So, like I said to Natasha, that is my only stipulation, let’s just take it easy for a few months, planning Christmas with the Keebles took it out of us. As does arranging simple get-togethers, so for the next few months there is just nothing going to be planned.
Natasha plainly didn’t listen to my stipulation because she is so excited and has already brought ‘The Bride’ magazine, which comes with approximately 30 odd supplements and supplements of supplements.
I feel my excitement waning............I wonder if they do a groom to be? ......or shall I just buy a copy of Nuts magazine............
Thursday, 28 January 2010
Taurus The Bull-Bag
Ballbags
That’s the name I have called her for years, I am pretty sure I never started it, it was my parents.
We done what all other families do (I think), start with the name Victoria, and then, through the years it gets shortened and then lengthened and added to.
Eventually it becomes ‘ballbags’!
I believe the evolution of the name Victoria went like this
Victoria
Tori
Taurus
Taurus the bull
Ballbags
She is beautiful and I am very proud of her.I will read this back in a few years time and wonder exactly why I am writing about my sister so randomly.So I shall now remind myself.......
She has been moaning that, whilst my blog is enjoyable and well written (her words but always nice!) She is never mentioned in them. That is my sister, it has to have her name in it. Very predictable, especially when there is a photo opportunity, for as long as I can remember she has always posed in every picture she has taken. It is very funny to watch but rather annoying after a while when she just won't stop!
So I felt it would be nice to write something and now i have. If you have met her then you will have no doubt heard her.......and heard her tell the story of me defacating on her foot many years ago. She loves that story she does. In fact, she loves anything to do with 'richard the thirds'. It is her facourite time to be involved in a conversation because she can use all the words she has for 'poo' in on go. Get her on the subject and she won't stop.
As I have said, I am very proud of her and consider her a very close friend as well as a sister. There isn't much I wouldn't tell her and she makes me laugh a ridiculous amount of times, out loud. Which if you know me; also really annoys me because I have come across very few funny women in my life and feel that all funny women trying to be funny,are just like those very unfunny comediennes like Victoria Wood or Dawn French. Sigh....
She is coming on holiday to Greece this year with me and my family and I am very excited. Like a kid really, I love it when I get to see her and I will be with her for a whole week.
This year Tori took over the family season ticket at Chelsea and gets to sit next to me, we sit next to some gentleman who seems to sniff so much it is endless from start to finish, Tori will constantly try to get me to go in first so I have to sit there next to 'Sniffy Snifferson' as she puts it! Oh how we both love when I just physically push her onto the seat next to him.
Before I do finish this (because I have just realised I may never stop, I have just realised that Tori has endless comedy potential in this blog!), I have to say again that I am proud of her for bringing up Tommy her son on her own for so many years and watching her proving herself in the profession she does and having the ambition is quite an inspiration to people.
I would also like to point out that I believe with all this praise i should add that she can also be, and mostly is; a div.
That’s the name I have called her for years, I am pretty sure I never started it, it was my parents.
We done what all other families do (I think), start with the name Victoria, and then, through the years it gets shortened and then lengthened and added to.
Eventually it becomes ‘ballbags’!
I believe the evolution of the name Victoria went like this
Victoria
Tori
Taurus
Taurus the bull
Ballbags
She is beautiful and I am very proud of her.I will read this back in a few years time and wonder exactly why I am writing about my sister so randomly.So I shall now remind myself.......
She has been moaning that, whilst my blog is enjoyable and well written (her words but always nice!) She is never mentioned in them. That is my sister, it has to have her name in it. Very predictable, especially when there is a photo opportunity, for as long as I can remember she has always posed in every picture she has taken. It is very funny to watch but rather annoying after a while when she just won't stop!
So I felt it would be nice to write something and now i have. If you have met her then you will have no doubt heard her.......and heard her tell the story of me defacating on her foot many years ago. She loves that story she does. In fact, she loves anything to do with 'richard the thirds'. It is her facourite time to be involved in a conversation because she can use all the words she has for 'poo' in on go. Get her on the subject and she won't stop.
As I have said, I am very proud of her and consider her a very close friend as well as a sister. There isn't much I wouldn't tell her and she makes me laugh a ridiculous amount of times, out loud. Which if you know me; also really annoys me because I have come across very few funny women in my life and feel that all funny women trying to be funny,are just like those very unfunny comediennes like Victoria Wood or Dawn French. Sigh....
She is coming on holiday to Greece this year with me and my family and I am very excited. Like a kid really, I love it when I get to see her and I will be with her for a whole week.
This year Tori took over the family season ticket at Chelsea and gets to sit next to me, we sit next to some gentleman who seems to sniff so much it is endless from start to finish, Tori will constantly try to get me to go in first so I have to sit there next to 'Sniffy Snifferson' as she puts it! Oh how we both love when I just physically push her onto the seat next to him.
Before I do finish this (because I have just realised I may never stop, I have just realised that Tori has endless comedy potential in this blog!), I have to say again that I am proud of her for bringing up Tommy her son on her own for so many years and watching her proving herself in the profession she does and having the ambition is quite an inspiration to people.
I would also like to point out that I believe with all this praise i should add that she can also be, and mostly is; a div.
Sunday, 24 January 2010
The big question
You see, I have been thinking about it for a LONG time, a very long time. It felt so very right, yet I couldn't help but think it is too soon. That is the problem with me, I second guess, it isn't that it isn't right to do it so soon, I am just not a hot-bed of spontaneity, that's all.
For the last couple of years I have been doing things differently, I had a baby, we had planned it, of course; we hadn't planned it to happen as quickly as it did! but it did, and praise science for what was produced, a cracker of a child.
I wanted that baby, I also wanted to spend my life with Natasha the moment I met her, she was way out of my league and couldn't believe it when she smiled and looked interested, I couldn't even think she was drunk as she was at work but she liked me and what a lucky girl she has been!!
Secretly, I have been making a few trips up to Hatton Garden to see a friend of a friend who owns a diamond setting business and if you excuse the pun, it was a 'gem' of a find, he got me the stone I requested and the mount I believed Natasha would like and once I had parted with a small fortune bob is your mothers brother.
The ring was now in the bag and at this point the nerves really started to kick in, I wouldn't say I was scared for the wrong answer, I just have always believed that I will ask this question only once, so it had to be good and had to be right, how the hell does someone make it right and when is it a good time to be so romantic, so cliched and sickly. I can be romantic but I feel like vomiting when it is too much. Unfortunately, I felt that I was going to have to fall into the vomit catergory.
A weekend trip to Bruges was brought for her christmas present so it was ideal, Isabella was to join us on her first trip to Europe, to be fair; it couldnt have been more of a perfect weekend. It was so easy to get there, Isabella was amazing and kept us and others laughing the whole weekend and Bruges was out of this world.The hotel is actually hard to put into words, amazing luxory and comfort. I have heard of good things about the city but nothing prepared me at all for how beautiful it was and it made it easier to 'pop' the question. Everywhere you look in Bruges is stunning, so the nerves kicked in as to where and when I will propose, I was a wreck but couldn't show it, in hindsight Natasha wondered what the hell was wrong with me from the beginning, she was also extremely suspicious of me shouting out "I'm nervous", whilst I had a doze on the eurotunnel in the car!
It has consumed me recently too much and it was only right that I 'get it out of the way' as they say. We got there early and thought the best thing was to get the ring from the case to the pocket. done-check. No suspicions there.
No to walk around Bruges and be interested whilst sorting out the best place to do it. er, not done, er, no check.
It was awful, I was sweating and had a couple of mini panic attacks, what the hell is wrong with me?!!
In the end I made her walk round and around Bruges with me and didn't get to do it so we went back to feed the bubba and get ready to go out for dinner. I was psyching myself up and knew that tonight was the night, that way we could enjoy the rest of the weekend(well, I could). So what did we do?...I made her walk round and around again and when we stumbled upon the statue of lovers, I thought this is as corny and as cliched as you can get. I just couldn't do it. I even paused right by it and thgought I was gonna collapse with stress! I made a joke about it being a rubbish statue and made for the nearest restaurant. A beautiful meal was had and we made our way back to the hotel with the bubba in the buggy, It had been raining but ceased for our walk passed the statue.
To make it all seem a surprise I had spent most of the holiday talking of why it isn't a good idea to get engaged so early in a relationship blah blah blah. I was doing my own head in.
As we got to the statue ask her how happy she was, is there anything I could do to make it happier, I went into my pocket and she started to pull away from me...uh oh
I had to grab her to show her I was serious, all the times I had jokingly got on one knee were about to backfire, she was doing a runner!
She kept asking me if I was serious (I hadn't even asked her yet), I was serious, I showed her the awful box (that my mama said she wouldn't even notice) containng the ring and asked her. She started to cry and kept asking me "really?", I felt choked myself and asked her again as if it was my final answer, I could almost hear the Who wants to be a millionaire music and the lights slamming down on me with that awful music!
She looked at me and said yes, I cried, partly out of the amazing stress release and mostly because I have never met anyone like her and cannot believe she would want to spend her life with me.
She has since spent the weekend in shock and randomly sobs, hopefully not in regret.
I am very happy and look forward to reading my blog back to myself in years to come and seeing how happy I am.
I would like to thank the following in the making of this film.
All the keebles for the secrets being kept.
Paul for putting me in touch with his diamond buddy. Thank u.
My work mates, who spent the last two weeks laughing at my nervousness and reminding me that I am lucky to have her, as I am a little, fat, dwarf, bender. Many thanks. I wouldn't want to have it any other way.
Isabella for being amazing.
So...roll on summer 2012......The olympics, the european championships, and I am getting married.
For the last couple of years I have been doing things differently, I had a baby, we had planned it, of course; we hadn't planned it to happen as quickly as it did! but it did, and praise science for what was produced, a cracker of a child.
I wanted that baby, I also wanted to spend my life with Natasha the moment I met her, she was way out of my league and couldn't believe it when she smiled and looked interested, I couldn't even think she was drunk as she was at work but she liked me and what a lucky girl she has been!!
Secretly, I have been making a few trips up to Hatton Garden to see a friend of a friend who owns a diamond setting business and if you excuse the pun, it was a 'gem' of a find, he got me the stone I requested and the mount I believed Natasha would like and once I had parted with a small fortune bob is your mothers brother.
The ring was now in the bag and at this point the nerves really started to kick in, I wouldn't say I was scared for the wrong answer, I just have always believed that I will ask this question only once, so it had to be good and had to be right, how the hell does someone make it right and when is it a good time to be so romantic, so cliched and sickly. I can be romantic but I feel like vomiting when it is too much. Unfortunately, I felt that I was going to have to fall into the vomit catergory.
A weekend trip to Bruges was brought for her christmas present so it was ideal, Isabella was to join us on her first trip to Europe, to be fair; it couldnt have been more of a perfect weekend. It was so easy to get there, Isabella was amazing and kept us and others laughing the whole weekend and Bruges was out of this world.The hotel is actually hard to put into words, amazing luxory and comfort. I have heard of good things about the city but nothing prepared me at all for how beautiful it was and it made it easier to 'pop' the question. Everywhere you look in Bruges is stunning, so the nerves kicked in as to where and when I will propose, I was a wreck but couldn't show it, in hindsight Natasha wondered what the hell was wrong with me from the beginning, she was also extremely suspicious of me shouting out "I'm nervous", whilst I had a doze on the eurotunnel in the car!
It has consumed me recently too much and it was only right that I 'get it out of the way' as they say. We got there early and thought the best thing was to get the ring from the case to the pocket. done-check. No suspicions there.
No to walk around Bruges and be interested whilst sorting out the best place to do it. er, not done, er, no check.
It was awful, I was sweating and had a couple of mini panic attacks, what the hell is wrong with me?!!
In the end I made her walk round and around Bruges with me and didn't get to do it so we went back to feed the bubba and get ready to go out for dinner. I was psyching myself up and knew that tonight was the night, that way we could enjoy the rest of the weekend(well, I could). So what did we do?...I made her walk round and around again and when we stumbled upon the statue of lovers, I thought this is as corny and as cliched as you can get. I just couldn't do it. I even paused right by it and thgought I was gonna collapse with stress! I made a joke about it being a rubbish statue and made for the nearest restaurant. A beautiful meal was had and we made our way back to the hotel with the bubba in the buggy, It had been raining but ceased for our walk passed the statue.
To make it all seem a surprise I had spent most of the holiday talking of why it isn't a good idea to get engaged so early in a relationship blah blah blah. I was doing my own head in.
As we got to the statue ask her how happy she was, is there anything I could do to make it happier, I went into my pocket and she started to pull away from me...uh oh
I had to grab her to show her I was serious, all the times I had jokingly got on one knee were about to backfire, she was doing a runner!
She kept asking me if I was serious (I hadn't even asked her yet), I was serious, I showed her the awful box (that my mama said she wouldn't even notice) containng the ring and asked her. She started to cry and kept asking me "really?", I felt choked myself and asked her again as if it was my final answer, I could almost hear the Who wants to be a millionaire music and the lights slamming down on me with that awful music!
She looked at me and said yes, I cried, partly out of the amazing stress release and mostly because I have never met anyone like her and cannot believe she would want to spend her life with me.
She has since spent the weekend in shock and randomly sobs, hopefully not in regret.
I am very happy and look forward to reading my blog back to myself in years to come and seeing how happy I am.
I would like to thank the following in the making of this film.
All the keebles for the secrets being kept.
Paul for putting me in touch with his diamond buddy. Thank u.
My work mates, who spent the last two weeks laughing at my nervousness and reminding me that I am lucky to have her, as I am a little, fat, dwarf, bender. Many thanks. I wouldn't want to have it any other way.
Isabella for being amazing.
So...roll on summer 2012......The olympics, the european championships, and I am getting married.
Thursday, 21 January 2010
Tooth!
We have a tooth! 25 weeks yesterday and we see her first tooth, bottom, middle tooth.Fantastic, she hasn't even given us trouble on the teething front, this child is amazing. So happy its hard to believe children could be a problem!
We are going to Bruges today for Natasha's christmas present, Isabellas first foray abroad. We had to get her a passport, Natasha didn't think we needed passports because we are travelling by train, she never ceases to amaze me.
We are going to Bruges today for Natasha's christmas present, Isabellas first foray abroad. We had to get her a passport, Natasha didn't think we needed passports because we are travelling by train, she never ceases to amaze me.
Thursday, 14 January 2010
Shish
How can a kebab shop be closed at 12.30am? I can’t understand it, it made me a very upset little tubby man, I tell you.
I don’t go out as often as I used to, in fact it is very few and far between but it doesn’t bother me one bit. I have different priorities now and love having a family and sitting there grunting my disgust at how bad Eastenders is or how diabolical Coronation St is, night after night. Soaps are my sole reason that I don’t watch much T.V. Television is bad for adults, Makes us very lazy, I could live without it but only as long as I lived next to a pub that shows every football game it can.
Never the less, I miss my friends; and when I go out, to me, it is a big thing. Big thing as in I won’t eat beforehand because I have every intention to chow down a large chicken shish and chips....washed down with a Diet Coke (has to be a Diet Coke) at the end of the evening. I wasn’t particularly late last night, would have been earlier but Scrabble and Dandy (not their real names) decided we hadn’t consumed enough alcohol and ‘persuaded’ me to cross the road to SO.UK bar. Anyway once I had emptied my wallet and gone into my overdraft as I paid for our drinks, it was time for the train home. I got off at Morden with the plan to assault and attack the menu of a place I haven’t been before, ‘Kebaby’ in the main street. I had eyed it up on the way out and got myself pretty excited over it! So this was the culmination of a how nights eagerness and anticipation.
CLOSED
Closed?
Had it sold out of Pittas?
Had the snow not killed enough dogs recently to keep the place stocked up and ready for the drunken fatties like myself to chow?
If I recall rightly, I was so annoyed I grumpily kicked some litter and walked off talking to myself mumbling things like ‘how can a kebab shop be closed?’ and repeating the word ‘unbelievable’ over and over again. I was so unhappy I can tell you. To top it off, at the bus stop waiting for the red thing my iPod decided to run out of battery so I was a very unhappy, alone, man at bus stop listening to nothing without his kebab.
I am still baffled as to why it was closed. Natasha reckons it was because it was only a Wednesday, she just doesn’t understand the drinking culture; I think I told her this in my drunken state whilst patting her head in a patronising manner. I am such a catch!
I don’t go out as often as I used to, in fact it is very few and far between but it doesn’t bother me one bit. I have different priorities now and love having a family and sitting there grunting my disgust at how bad Eastenders is or how diabolical Coronation St is, night after night. Soaps are my sole reason that I don’t watch much T.V. Television is bad for adults, Makes us very lazy, I could live without it but only as long as I lived next to a pub that shows every football game it can.
Never the less, I miss my friends; and when I go out, to me, it is a big thing. Big thing as in I won’t eat beforehand because I have every intention to chow down a large chicken shish and chips....washed down with a Diet Coke (has to be a Diet Coke) at the end of the evening. I wasn’t particularly late last night, would have been earlier but Scrabble and Dandy (not their real names) decided we hadn’t consumed enough alcohol and ‘persuaded’ me to cross the road to SO.UK bar. Anyway once I had emptied my wallet and gone into my overdraft as I paid for our drinks, it was time for the train home. I got off at Morden with the plan to assault and attack the menu of a place I haven’t been before, ‘Kebaby’ in the main street. I had eyed it up on the way out and got myself pretty excited over it! So this was the culmination of a how nights eagerness and anticipation.
CLOSED
Closed?
Had it sold out of Pittas?
Had the snow not killed enough dogs recently to keep the place stocked up and ready for the drunken fatties like myself to chow?
If I recall rightly, I was so annoyed I grumpily kicked some litter and walked off talking to myself mumbling things like ‘how can a kebab shop be closed?’ and repeating the word ‘unbelievable’ over and over again. I was so unhappy I can tell you. To top it off, at the bus stop waiting for the red thing my iPod decided to run out of battery so I was a very unhappy, alone, man at bus stop listening to nothing without his kebab.
I am still baffled as to why it was closed. Natasha reckons it was because it was only a Wednesday, she just doesn’t understand the drinking culture; I think I told her this in my drunken state whilst patting her head in a patronising manner. I am such a catch!
Monday, 11 January 2010
I love the church
I am up and about early today, big day for me, lots and lots to do. Me around London on my little pop pop scooter, I love it.
You can’t beat London as a city, I haven’t been to as many major cities in the world as I would have liked to by now in my life, but it would be hard to beat this place, and it has everything. Still think the best place I have ever lived was my time in Camberwell, down the Walworth rd.
For anyone that has ever been down the Walworth Rd, like me, it is a hole, packed to the brim of what I like to call....’mongs’. Perhaps I am a ‘mong ‘for fitting in so well and love it. It just seemed to have around me such a mixture of friendly people and no trouble at all. I think I was there for three years, I may be wrong and it is only two but I never saw any trouble at all, I then moved to North Cheam when I bought my first flat and say more trouble in the first six months than I care to remember. I am not saying that Camberwell was trouble free, far from it; I regularly use to leave my house, turn into Walworth rd and be stopped by police tape, indicating to the public that during the night another fool decided to end somebody’s life with a gun. It never once scared me though, I find that strange, I am not sure why but I use that as a reason why I felt so secure in that area.
The flat I lived in was a lovely little housing association place given to me by an organisation called the ‘Church commissioners’. I have never felt so indebted to an organisation or person(other than my mama!) for helping me in my life, I will never understate what giving me that flat done for me, it gave me a responsibility and direction in life and it was something that I never had or strived to have before.
It is ironic that I am indebted to a church organisation yet I am such a staunch atheist and go against pretty much everything they do (all churches).
You can’t beat London as a city, I haven’t been to as many major cities in the world as I would have liked to by now in my life, but it would be hard to beat this place, and it has everything. Still think the best place I have ever lived was my time in Camberwell, down the Walworth rd.
For anyone that has ever been down the Walworth Rd, like me, it is a hole, packed to the brim of what I like to call....’mongs’. Perhaps I am a ‘mong ‘for fitting in so well and love it. It just seemed to have around me such a mixture of friendly people and no trouble at all. I think I was there for three years, I may be wrong and it is only two but I never saw any trouble at all, I then moved to North Cheam when I bought my first flat and say more trouble in the first six months than I care to remember. I am not saying that Camberwell was trouble free, far from it; I regularly use to leave my house, turn into Walworth rd and be stopped by police tape, indicating to the public that during the night another fool decided to end somebody’s life with a gun. It never once scared me though, I find that strange, I am not sure why but I use that as a reason why I felt so secure in that area.
The flat I lived in was a lovely little housing association place given to me by an organisation called the ‘Church commissioners’. I have never felt so indebted to an organisation or person(other than my mama!) for helping me in my life, I will never understate what giving me that flat done for me, it gave me a responsibility and direction in life and it was something that I never had or strived to have before.
It is ironic that I am indebted to a church organisation yet I am such a staunch atheist and go against pretty much everything they do (all churches).
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